Intro: Do you feel like you were meant to have a kick-ass career as a hair stylist? Like you got into this industry to make big things happen?
Maybe you’re struggling to build a solid base and want some stability. Maybe you know social media is important, but it feels like a waste of time because you aren’t seeing any results. Maybe you’ve already had some amazing success but are craving more. Maybe you’re ready to truly enjoy the freedom and flexibility this industry has to offer.
Cutting and coloring skills will only get you so far, but to build a lifelong career as a wealthy stylist, it takes business skills and a serious marketing strategy. When you’re ready to quit, just working in your business and start working on it, join us here, where we share real success stories from real stylists.
I’m Britt Seva, social media and marketing strategist just for hair stylists, and this is the Thriving Stylist Podcast.
Britt Seva: What is up you guys, and welcome back to the Thriving Stylist Podcast. I’m your host Britt Seva, and I am joined this week on the podcast by Gina Bianca.
If you’re not already following Gina yet, you absolutely should be. She and I see very similarly on most things in the industry. But when I recently started talking about pre-booking and how I don’t believe it’s for everyone, she commented on my Instagram post and we decided together that we’ve got to hash this out. We’ve got to get on the same page about pre-booking. Let’s talk about when it’s good, when it’s bad.
This interview was amazing. Not only did we just talk about pre-booking, we also talked about professional boundaries and Gina’s concern for new stylists entering the industry. You guys, this interview is so good. I’m so excited for you to hear it. Let’s get into it.
Gina, hi! First of all, I’m so excited for our chat today. I feel like we could easily do this once a month. Nobody get excited, cause that probably is not going to happen, but I just geek out over talking to you. I’m so excited to get to connect again.
The podcast that we did together for my show–gosh, it was probably in like 2019–still ranks at the top. It is still our highest tracking show. So I’m just excited to connect again. This will be so fun.
Gina Bianca: Oh my God, I didn’t know that. That’s amazing, Britt. That was a really good episode. You caught me on a day when we did that. I was super like, you know what?–I don’t know if I could swear on here. I was just like, you know what, whatever, I don’t care. I’m going to be literally just, I’m telling it like it is and I’m always like that. But you caught me on a day. That was a good interview and I still love that episode.
Britt: I do too! I feel like I have that luck. I’m always like, yes, I got them on a good day! I feel like I always have that luck. That’s my favorite. I love it when you come in fired up, real open, honest. We’re going to bring that today too.
Gina: Totally. Thank you for having me, Britt. I’m so happy and I love to connect with you too. I feel like you and I are definitely cut from the same cloth. We’re super different in a sense of, you’re organized. I’m a disaster. You know what I mean?
Britt: Listen, I was telling you before we started this, I was like, if I appear organized, I’m winning. I’m equally, if not more, of a disaster behind the scenes. I get it.
Gina:Yeah, no, but I totally love you, Britt. You inspired me so much. If I can just share–I was driving to my 2019 class store. This is before I ever had a podcast and I would listen to your podcasts nonstop because I was like, finally, someone who freaking gets it. As a burnt-out salon owner, I’m listening to everything and I’m like, Oh my God, I love Britt Seva.
There’s something I always say that you say, if you don’t mind I share. Something that you say that I always will repeat. I’m like, like my friend Britt Seva says, “Confidence comes from knowing that you put in the work.”
Literally one of my favorite–it’s the best. People are like, how do I be confident? Confidence comes from knowing that you put in the work. That is literally the best definition of the century in my opinion, because it is so true. You’re confident when you can do it backwards, in your sleep, upside down, and you can just get it done. It comes from putting in that work and practicing and executing. So I just wanted to share that because it’s something I say every day.
Britt: I just love you to pieces. I want to just throw it right back. When you first crossed my radar, I didn’t even remember when it was, it’s been years now. I had that same feeling like, oh my gosh, finally somebody who gets it. It was like the first time where I felt like, wow, we’re actually aligned in the way that we see the industry, our values, our mindset, everything.
You’re still the only person where I really feel like 99.9% of the time, you and I are one in one in the same.
Gina: Totally.
Britt: I think it’s very rare, and I respect the fact that everybody in the industry and in the world has differences of opinion. But I’m excited to geek out with you today, cause I think that you have certainly inspired me and I’m so thankful we connected. I think that us coming together as a couple of powerhouses, I’m hoping we can inspire some people to find their confidence and own their truth and really kick it up into high gear. I’m excited.
Gina: Yeah, totally. And Britt, you know what? The fact that you and I can disagree on something that’s literally an opinion and come together and talk about it like grown-ass women–those are the kind of friends that I want.
I just got off a call today with another very incredible woman. I’m looking to build those relationships with women where we can come together. I am in no competition with anyone.
I believe in what you do. I’m a part of Thrivers. I love what you do. I think you’re amazing, not like I have time to do anything. But I just wanted to support you. I was like, take my money, Britt. I love you because I really support you and I think you’re great. I’m just really grateful to connect and I know we’ll have a long relationship and friendship together.
Britt: Same. I think that’s important for people to hear, too. I always say that people miss the pre-show. The pre-show is the best part. But we started this call, we’re both like, let’s just connect more. Let’s talk more. Let’s support each other as, what you said, bad-ass women up to big things and down to uplift and industry. We’re in this together. We’re not each other’s competition, nor does anybody have to be. Can’t we all be fighting for the same thing and lift each other up along the way?
That’s why I love you, and that’s why I’m so thankful that we have connected, because it’s rare to find people who truly feel like that, where we can just truly openly support each other and lift each other up in the process. I think it’s exciting.
Gina: I love it. Well, I know that you had people sending in what they wanted to talk about. So…
Britt: Let’s do it. You ready? Okay. Thank you to everybody who gave us some suggestions. So I shared on Instagram, I was like, me and Gina are connecting. People got really excited. I said we’re going to talk about our values and what we see in business, where we align, and where we might disagree too and just talk it through. So I have a lot of topics. I’m trying to think where to start.
Gina: Let’s start with pre-book because that is like the number one thing that I was just–I commented on your page on your post and I was like, I love you so much. I just disagree. I was afraid to write that because I didn’t want to get canceled by my friend and I didn’t know how you would be, and obviously you’re amazing. But you know, it’s always just, instead of just being like, ew whatever, I was just like, respectfully disagree.
You had put out a podcast and I understand because then I heard you talking and talking and talking about it. I was like, oh, we agree. It’s not like that big of a deal. You know what I mean? There was one thing, your podcast was like “The Dangers of Pre-booking”, and I was like, absolutely not! I was like, no. How could she? What is she doing?
I, honestly Britt, you’re brilliant because I literally was posting about it, talking about it. I literally was like firing up people about it. I was like, what do you think about prebook? Are you pre-booking? Are you not pre-booking? I posted in this huge forum, Strategies’ Salon Ideal Business Exchange, and I was just like, what do you guys think of pre-booking? It blew up. It went viral there. Then we were talking about in Mastermind. I was like, no, this is not good advice. I don’t like this. I love Britt. I was like prebook, prebook.
Then I listened to podcasts and I was like, okay, I get it. Then I heard you say pre-booking is detrimental to your business, and I was just like, no, she doesn’t–I was like, that’s not what–I was just like, I get where you’re coming from. Because there are stylists who have guests that do not need to be pre-booked. I totally get it.
Then you did your quiz. It was on Clubhouse, and I listened. I was like, well, let me listen to what you’re saying about pre-booking now, because I was so pissed off. I was like, goddamnit Britt. I wanted to agree with you on everything. I’ll just be real about it, you know, because I just want us to be like, yes, let’s elevate the industry. But it’s just not like that. Nobody is exactly the same, right?
And then I heard you say, let me take the pre-booking quiz. I would love if you shared that, because I know I’m putting this on my podcast, too, because I believe that pre-booking is the number one way to grow your business.
There are three ways to grow: average ticket, frequency of visit, and new clients. Frequency of visit, getting your guests to purchase more and to get in the salon and more, I totally believe that pre-booking is that number one driver. However, I don’t think you should pre-book everybody. Then I heard you say that, and I was just like, okay, so we do align. Then I heard you do the quiz.
So basically, my thing was pre-booking is number one way to grow your business. If you look at your schedule eight weeks out and it’s 80% full because you’re 80% pre-booking on that week, you’re going to feel way more secure if it was 80% empty, if you weren’t focusing on pre-book. What you focus on you move towards, right? So focusing on pre-book for those dream clients that you love, who you want to get in, five stars.
If you’ve got guests, if you’re overbooked, if you’re packed, we’re going to talk about price increases later. If you’re over 80% productive, that’s an indicator of demand, and you need to raise your prices. You may have to not pre-book these people who aren’t in your specialty, who aren’t your ideal customer.
I would love for you–because even, I’m going to write it down because I still learn so much from you, Britt. I would love to just go through that because I understand where you’re coming from. I don’t like how you put it on the podcast as “the dangers”, because I feel like some people will take that and be like, Britt Seva’s God, I will just read this. They won’t even listen to the episode.
And that’s where I was just like gah! That’s it. That was the, literally–I can’t think of an area that I’ve been like, (beep) Britt Seva. I can never think of another area. That was the one thing. I was like, excuse me, Britt. I hope you’re not mad at me, but I disagree. Hello? I literally didn’t want to say it, but I also had a feeling we can have a civil debate about it, and then here we are on the podcast.
So that is my spiel about pre-book. I think it’s the number one way to grow. I don’t think everyone should be pre-booked and it’s really important to know your numbers and those KPIs, and the KPI is a key performance indicator. Pre-book, productivity, customer loyalty, retention, all of those things, it’s important to know and pre-book is one way to just drive forward. So that’s my spiel.
Britt: That was amazing. Going back to… so for those–I’m going to guess the majority of people didn’t see, but a lot of people did where I shared an Instagram post about pre-booking, and you in the classiest way we’re like, I see you, I hear you, but I completely disagree. I love that because it’s like, you care about me enough and I care about you enough that we can have the conversation. Immediately I was like, yes, let’s talk about this!
To what you said, when you went in Facebook Groups and started a conversation, and when you went to your Mastermind and started a conversation, and I did the same thing, went to Thrivers Society and started the conversation: look at the ripple effect that we made. It just… it makes people think.
I think that’s where you and I both align, no matter what the topic is, just don’t be an autopilot in your business. Think for a second. Maybe Gina, I’m dead-ass wrong, maybe 100%. Maybe it’s horrible advice but if it makes you stop and think, that’s already a win. I don’t think it’s horrible advice. I think what it comes down to is that there’s different business models that work for everybody.
There’s something that you said that really stood out to me when you were talking about looking at your books and seeing your pre-booked, I think you said for eight weeks and that feeling of security. God, can I really empathize with that, because as human beings, the feeling of security is one of our internal needs. Every single one of us as humans needs to feel love, needs to feel security. That security is so crucial and important, I think, especially coming out of 2020 when nothing was certain and that felt like trash. That feeling of security is so important, and that is what pre-booking provides.
I think for me that there is a place and space in all of our careers where pre-booking is a really solid strategy, because it does bring that security. It builds that base clientele. I think for a lot of people, either kind of in the wake of 2020, or just as their career has gone on, they may choose freedom and flexibility over that predictability or that, if we want to call it security.
I think it’s important to just realize you’re making a choice with everything we do in business. You and I, Gina, are always making choices in business. What’s more important to me right now? Do I want to make more money or do I want to travel with my family? Do I want to put more courses and stuff out there? Or do I just want to ride what I’ve got? We’re always at a crossroads and making choices and realizing that pre-booking is one of those things where you are making a choice as to how you want to run your business.
I pulled up the quiz as you were chatting. I was like, yes, the quiz! I’m going to share it again, but then literally, if you’re like, I think this is bullsh*t, let’s talk it through.
The quiz I shared on the Clubhouse is “How to know if pre-booking is working for you.” This was the first layer of the quiz. So for some people pre-booking is great, and here’s how to know if it’s probably a good fit.
You love the schedule you work and you wouldn’t change a thing. If you’re like, I’m stoked on my schedule. I’m stoked on the flow of clientele. I’m good. Pre-booking might be great for you. You love the money you make and you see significant financial growth year over year. For me, significant financial growth is 15 to 20% or more, meaning if you made 100K in 2018, you made 120K in 2019. Something like that.
You’re able to fit in new guests within three to four weeks to see you. So people don’t have to wait four months to get on your books. You have flexibility in your schedule and are able to prioritize personal time. You don’t spend two or more hours a week managing your schedule with rescheduling and cancellations.
That last one is so in alignment with what you said, because you’re right. Some clients should never prebook, under any circumstances. Not a good fit. Won’t respect your time anyway, so there’s no point in doing it. I think where we both agree for sure about pre-booking is the idea that it’s not the one-stop solution. It’s not a fit for all. It’s a fit for some clients and stylists.
Okay. So if you can agree to all of those things, then yes, I say pre-booking is working for you. You love your schedule. You love your money. Guests are able to get in to see you without an issue. You feel like you do have flexibility in your schedule and can prioritize your mental health and your wellbeing and all that kind of stuff. Cool.
How to know if pre-booking is not working for you. Number one, you struggle to reschedule a guest when they cancel or want to shift their appointments because you’re booked so tight, which causes clients to have to wait six to eight weeks if they have to reschedule. You’re booked at least two weeks out and your income does not grow at least 20% a year.
That’s one of the things that I saw in the salon, Gina. I think that this is, I wouldn’t say it’s the exception, but I don’t think it’s the rule either, is that some people pre-book themselves to a fault and they’ve chosen security over growth potential.
Because even if you do price increases… You could probably increase your prices really well with confidence. Some people are only increasing their prices three, four or 5% a year. So then you’re only able to grow your income three, four, 5% a year if you’re pre-booked out that solid. So you’ve created this unintentional financial cap for yourself. Not everybody does it, but some people do. I think it’s worth talking about.
You aren’t seeing at least four new guests requests a month. And when you do see a new guest request, they have to wait four, six, eight weeks to get you in. Another indicator: you don’t have much schedule flexibility. You’re pretty locked into your books, and if you’re invited to a special event six weeks from now on a Saturday, you’d have to decline.
Again, that’s a personal preference. Some people were like eff that, I don’t want to go to the bridal shower anyway. I’m cool skipping the invite. But for some people, they feel like they’re missing– as stylists, we work on nights and weekends and for some people it feels like they’re missing too much. Something to think about.
You spend more time than you’d like to be managing your books, squeezing clients in, and rescheduling your appointments. If your schedule is a nightmare, it’s like the bane of your existence, it’s something to think about.
Then, last but not least, who should seriously be pre-booking on a regular basis? Clients who come in weekly, consistently. Clients who come in every four weeks consistently, exactly like what you said, there’s some clients who are like clockwork. They’ll come in on the first Wednesday of the month at 3:00 PM and they’re predictable and they’re good. Service packages that are 3+ hours long, if this is a proven, consistent guest. And if you’re a building stylist with lots of room available and hope to double or triple your income this year.
Gina: Yeah, I love that.
Britt: To what you said, it’s the rapid growth formula. You can grow rapidly, especially if you’ve got the time to do it.
Gina: You know, I have fear for the new generation of the industry, and I don’t know about you. I’m sure we can align on this. I have a lot of fear for the new generation coming up.
Britt: Tell me what your fears are.
Gina: My fear is it’s very difficult to do hair now. It’s always been–
Britt: When did you get licensed?
Gina: 2009.
Britt: Okay, so you and I are in that same bubble, like we came in around the same time. The industry looked nothing like it does now. Yeah.
Gina: I built my business on Groupon. That’s how I became good at pricing.
Britt: Yes! Yes.
Gina: Because I was doing a $49 full highlight transformation and building the ticket
a la carte, and I really learned how to–Anyways, I have a lot of fear for the new industry and I worry because, you know–I saw an article encouraging people not to critically think.
Britt: What?
Gina: I saw an article on, I don’t even know if it was like The New York Times or something, that said don’t critically think, don’t worry about it.
I feel like the new generation, I just have so much fear. So when they hear someone say don’t pre-book or whatever, and they don’t do the work to listen, I have fear that a new stylist less than three years in is going to think that pre-booking is not critical and they’re going to wonder why they’re not growing. It’s like building that relationship.
A lot of my pushback on that was fear for the new stylists assuming, and not everybody is going to be like that. There’s going to be one in 10 people who are above and beyond. But those 9 people who aren’t going to listen to the episode, who aren’t going to take the quiz, and who aren’t going to go and really think about that. Because that’s a lot of people.
There’s so much information, Britt. I’m sure that you can relate. Everybody’s a coach. Everybody’s an educator. Everybody has advice. There’s a course for literally everything. It’s like, okay, great. I get it. For me, I can’t even listen. I got to turn it off and stay in my own lane and stay focused.
So I know that there’s just information overload and people are sitting on Clubhouse for 40 hours a week, listening, listening, listening, and not doing sh*t. They’re not doing anything. They’re just sitting there listening and then they go to do something and they’ve got 400 opinions in their head.
That’s why I love that you and I are in the same–we look in the same direction: growth. We look in the same direction. We understand. We share a lot of community members and I feel really proud and happy for our members who, at least, are listening to two solid voices to help them go forward.
I love the quiz and I think it’s great. I actually have a stylist at the network where pre-booking probably isn’t good for her, but many of them are too afraid to do online booking. So that’s a thing. You have to be open for all of it or else you’re going to struggle I feel.
I think that when we started this conversation… well, you started it. I added to it. I’ve been talking about pre-book forever, but you kind of fired it up.
I think it opened a new can of worms about boundaries. You are able to fit in new guests, flexibility with personal time, what you talked about pre-booking out eight weeks. If you’re booking out past eight weeks, you’re going to be stressed out on that. You have to close your books and you have to learn how to say no. No is a complete (BEEP) sentence.
You don’t have to explain yourself. You don’t owe Sally anything. Nobody needs to know about you. It’s personal. It’s private. If you got to take off for a baby shower. If I have to cancel today, I’m going to say, Hey, I’m sorry. I have to cancel today. Here’s my reschedule link. I don’t owe anybody an explanation. I don’t. I really don’t.
Britt: Yes, I agree with you. I want to take a time-out there. How did you get to that place?
Gina: Do you want to know the real answer, Britt?
Britt: Always.
Gina: I’m in recovery and you know what? I’ve been putting myself last for 29 years. I’m in recovery. I struggle with codependency and people who are listening to this are going to be like, Oh, where is this going? But it comes from childhood sh*t. When you don’t get what you need when you needed it, when you were a child–My dad was in jail. My mom was never around. She was working, she was doing everything she could so we can survive.
I grew up taking care of myself, raising my brother and I got bullied a lot. So when you’re living your life to be liked and appreciated and get those things, all you do is put others first and you put yourself last and you change who you are and you change your needs to make everybody else feel good.
Hair stylist, artists in general, many of us, not all of us, many of us have some kind of trauma. Creatives are very interesting human beings and they’re the most amazing human beings in the world.
And you know what? The fact that we’re in the service business where we have to literally deal with relationships. Relationships are the biggest form of uncertainty. You can’t control somebody else. So it’s like we’re in these relationships with our clients, with our employers, with our coworkers and our whole life is relationships.
If you’re doing it long enough and if you’ve been hurt enough, like when I spend eight hours on somebody’s hair and I message them and say, Hey, do you like it? And they’re just like, eh, I don’t like it, blah, blah, blah. Then I try to make it right and they ghost me… it’s just like, okay, I put my heart and soul–I’m a human being. How people act right now… that’s why I have fear for the new generation, because people aren’t nice.
So we have to develop not only external boundaries with our schedules, our pricing, what we’re able to do. We have to develop internal boundaries too, to protect. I think of it as silver armor around my chest and my whole top, my stomach and my chest that protects my heart from the (BEEP) poison darts that people hit me with.
You know, someone can send me comments on my post and it’s the meanest thing someone could ever say. And it’s like, you know what? I can’t take that to heart.
I wasn’t like this, you know, and I had really big problems with drugs and alcohol. I have an eating disorder, sex and love addiction, crazy (BEEP), every 12 step program, I need to be in. Food, everything. Every 12 step program I should be in.
Being in recovery, I’m very new to recovery. I’m still trying to do a meeting a day, you know? And how did I get to the point of that? Because if I put other people before myself, it’s life or death. It’s life or death. My boundaries and my values have changed. My values used to be success and saying yes to everything, be a visionary, growth, set an example, be a role model, all of these things. It’s stressful.
Now my values are more like health, love, vulnerability, boundaries, making an impact. I can’t make an impact unless I put myself first. No is a complete sentence and I keep saying it, those who mind don’t matter. And those who matter don’t mind, literally. Those who mind don’t matter. Those who matter don’t mind.
I think people violating boundaries today, it’s a huge issue. It goes with pricing, scheduling, all of those things. We need to be able to say–and for me, Britt, I’m just going to pop this in and I’m sorry I’m rambling.
I’m a beauty influencer, educator, entrepreneur. I do hair two Thursdays a month. I make people pay in full. I don’t want people to book me. I don’t market it. If someone wants hair, I send them my booking link and l try to price them out. So I’m not pre-booking. I’m a huge advocate of pre-book, but I let people book between like three months. I don’t schedule a way out because I like freedom and flexibility, too.
But it took 12 years to get there. So you can’t try to emulate somebody or try to duplicate something if you’re not there yet. So my fear for the new generation is that they’re going to want to skip 10 years and try to do these things and fail and fall flat on their face and wonder why it isn’t working or what they’re saying isn’t real or isn’t true. I just have fear because it does take time and it takes boundaries and it takes a lot of work.
How did I get there, Britt? A freaking 29 years of a crazy life and then finally, after 29 years and going through a total mental breakdown, be able to say I’m putting myself first. And if people don’t like it, get out of my life and never come back. I’m not afraid to lose. Letting go is the biggest gift, and when you let go someone who’s toxic, 20 people in your life, gifts, will come floating around you like angels, cause you have that toxic energy out.
Britt: It’s so true. I want to agree with literally every drop of brilliance you just shared. You gave me a huge light bulb moment when you were talking about the article you read about “don’t use critical thinking,” which first of all is terrifying.
I’m the mother of a 17 year old and I’m truly terrified for her future. Despite my best efforts, I’m very nervous. The young up and coming industry, whether you are newly licensed, it’s a second career for you, or you’re like my daughter who is about to graduate high school and figuring out what’s next; it is a really different industry they’re entering into. We are living in a different world completely.
The light bulb moment for me was that I think often I assume they’re going to listen to the whole thing or they’ve already taken into account X, Y, and Z, and I’m not always given that grace. Actually, more often than not, not given that grace. More often than not, somebody will hear a 1% of my coaching any given time.
Like I’ve said so openly, I didn’t realize that pre-booking podcast would take off like it did. I had no idea, but you’re right. If that’s the only thing anybody’s ever heard from me, and then they don’t put it into context with everything else. Like you said, some of your stylists aren’t a fan of online booking. It is systematic. Everything in our industry that can create success… there’s no, one-off thing. Oh, if you get good at Instagram, now you’re going to make it. Oh, if you get your pricing down, then you’re going to make it. Oh, if you pick the right salon location, that’s all you need. It is a holistic system.
Gina: It’s a lifestyle.
Britt: It’s a lifestyle. That’s the perfect way to say it. You hit the nail on the head, too, when you said there are no shortcuts. I do believe it doesn’t have to take–I don’t know how long it took you to find financial stability in your career. I think for us, it was a longer journey, probably just because the speed of everything seems to have condensed in the last decade or so.
However, you still have to go through all the phases. You still have to ride the struggle bus. You still have to feel like you’re going to tear your hair out because no matter how hard you scream that you’re an amazing stylist, nobody’s coming in to see you. You are still going to go through all of those pain points and it’s making sure that you’re making the right decision at each of those critical points in your career that’s going to allow you to be successful.
To what you’re saying about being fearful for the next generation, what makes me nervous is patience will always be a part of this industry. I don’t know if that will ever change. There’s no magic pill. There’s no quick fix. If you aren’t patient, if you aren’t driven, if you’re not willing to find the confidence by doing the work, if you’re not willing to spend the time to find the right mentors and people to follow you who are actually going to give solid advice; it’s going to be a rough ride, a really rough journey.
I’m nervous too, and I don’t know what the answer is, but it’s going to be interesting to see what unfolds over the next few years.
Gina: Well, you know, everything is really changing with education. You and I are so ahead of the game when it comes to providing those resources with what we offer the industry.
I don’t think people realize the value of having a mentor and a coach. I had mentors my entire career. Every salon I worked at, I had multiple mentors. I had mentors in other States. I had people who I can call. I aligned myself with certain brands, not haircare brands. I’m talking about people who were like, I see you, I respect you. I want to help you grow. I had people who cared about me, who still care about me.
Today, I’m sorry, Britt–you can’t find a job. A lot of people can’t find a W2 job. I don’t have W2 positions and I’m adding them because I’m just like, sh*t. People can’t find a job that–salon owners are over it. There are very few, 1 in 10 salon owners, who are really doing it. I’m actually interviewing one right after this for the podcast about how she has made a successful commission salon for so many years.
A lot of people can’t even find a job, so what are you going to do to replace that mentorship? Are you just going to sit around and wait for it? If you’re the smartest person in the room, you’re in the wrong room. You’re the average of the five people you hang out with the most.
So if you’re in Mastermind or Thrivers and you’ve got people around you who are overachievers–that podcast you did with the stylist, the overachiever or the whole… If you have those kinds of people around you and you have somebody there who you can have in your ear, the same way Robert Chromeans was in my ear…
I think that the new generation of stylists, I don’t know, the cream is going to rise to the top. I wish more people saw the value because you’re not getting what we got.
Britt: Nope. It doesn’t exist anymore. The world that you and I got to grow up in in this industry died. It’s gone, and it’s a different journey you have to walk, to what you said.
Gina: You really just have to figure it out and get those mentors. You can’t just look in the salon and look around and be like, well, where’s my mentor? It’s like, are you my mother? Why two Dr. Seuss references in one podcast? I don’t know.
Britt: Legit, we read that book last night. My six year old son and I read, Are You My Mother? last night. Yes.
Gina: Are you my mentor? Someone DM-ing me on Instagram: will you be my mentor? Are you in Mastermind? There’s no stupid questions, Britt, but there are lazy questions.
Britt: Can we talk about that DM for a second? You and I have gotten that DM umpteen times, I’m sure, and my response is always the same. Will you be my mentor? I say:
Hey, great to connect. What does that mean to you?
I don’t know, but I know I need one. LOL.
What? You don’t even know what you’re asking me for, but you’re asking me to be this fictitious thing? I understand where they’re coming from, because I think there is this quest of–I think a lot of stylists in the industry, new, experienced, whatever, are lost. Lost AF, don’t even know they’re spiraling. They’re circling the bowl, hoping something amazing happens. I understand how that freefall feels. It’s brutal. But to what you said, you had Robert Chromeans in your ear.
Gina: All the time.
Britt: You need to do the work. Obsess over Gina. Check out my stuff. Dive in head first. There is an abundance of education and information out there right now to a fault. Let’s keep it 100. Not all information is equal and there’s some sh*t out there too. But sort through that.
To what you’re saying, connect with people, get referrals to mentors or programs or influencers or educators who are actually making an impact in people’s lives, where they can say, listen, I follow Gina, and this is what happened. I listened to Britt’s thing on this, and these were my results. You have to sort through the bullsh*t and find the quality stuff.
To what you said, double down on a relationship. One, two systems max; you can’t follow eight people and think you’re going to get to where you’re going.
Gina: I always say that. I’m like, focus for a year on this. Focus for a year and see what happens.
Britt: You have to. You have to, and to think you can go it alone is foolish.
Gina: We’re biologically hardwired for connection. It’s not real. If you want to do it all on your own, you can try, but it’s not going to be the same. You need support. Everybody does. I need support.
Britt, I listened to your podcasts nonstop on my tour. When I was traveling and teaching and changing the world, in my opinion, I was listening to your podcast on my five-hour drives. I was just like I freaking love her, and you were in my ear too. You were one of my mentors too.
There’s just so much. It’s really important to–you’re the average of the five people you hang out with the most. When I have Robert in my ear 30% of the day, Britt in my ear for 20% of the day, and then I’m executing what they’re saying. I’m not just listening, listening, listening. I love Clubhouse, you guys. But I’m like get off Clubhouse for 50 hours a week and do something with your life.
I’m sorry if this is tough love. I’m not sorry. But I see people living on that sh*t. What are you actually executing? Do I want you to come hang out in my room? Yeah, but what are you doing? Do you work? Sorry, Britt.
Britt: Let’s talk about that for 2.5 seconds because they do work. But here’s the thing about Clubhouse that concerns me, because I love Clubhouse too. Samesies. First of all, this is the most humbling experience I’ve ever had, cause I look up to you so much. So even to hear that you listen to my podcast is very full circle, very centering to me.
Gina: All the time. I recommend it to everybody.
Britt: I love you. You’re amazing.
Gina: I love you too.
Britt: Okay. So I was in a Clubhouse. I’ve actually heard this a couple of times where somebody will be like, sorry, I’m actually blow drying a client. I don’t know if you can hear me? And they’re listening to Clubhouse in their ear while they’re doing guests.
I’m like, if I’m their client and you’re talking to somebody else in your earphone, whether you’re on Clubhouse, whether you’re taking a phone call, I don’t know what you’re doing, but I’m here for you. You need to be making an emotional connection with me. What the hell is happening right now?
Gina: I would fire someone for that. I would fire an employee if they even look at their phone while they’re supposed to be working on the floor and they’re not taking pictures. It is so rude.
Britt: So rude! It’s disrespectful as a human being. What are we doing? How did we lose track of what respect means in human form? It’s so wild to me. To exactly what you’re saying, I always think of education, information, learning, whatever, in two forms: there’s input and output.
You and I, I know we believe in this the same, you and I are lifetime students. So we’re always looking to learn, connect, mentorship, everything. But we also believe in output. You and I can listen to everything for as much as we want, but until we show up and do work, like we’re doing here day, until you show up and put in the effort and put into practice what you’re hearing in the Clubhouse, what we hear on our podcasts, what you learned from our programs, nothing will change.
So the input is great. You and I love input too. But before we even went live, you and I were both talking about the output, how much work we’re putting in. Without the output, nothing will change, and I think that’s a missing piece, especially for the younger generation. It is so fun to listen to all the fun, sexy topics and it’s like a rush of adrenaline. It’s like a jolt. But until you actually put it into practice, literally nothing will change in your business.
Gina: Totally. So Britt, I have a question for you because you had asked me how did you get to the point where you can say no or whatever? I have a question for you because I feel like you have great boundaries. I feel like you–I’ll be DM-ing you on Instagram. I’m like, Hey, Britt! Heart, heart.
And it’s like, you’re not on there. You’re working, I feel like. You have really good boundaries in general, in your business. How do you have boundaries? What is your advice or recommendation for setting those boundaries?
Britt: First of all, samesies. A lot of what you said, I was sitting here nodding, cause I really echo your experiences. A lot comes from trauma, for sure.
I spent about 32 years of my life as a human doormat. Literally, what do you need? I’ll bend over backwards for you. I’ll take the heat and the pain so that you don’t have to suffer. I know you know what I’m talking about. Overserved, same thing. My dad was gone. My mom was working. As you’re talking, I’m like, Oh my gosh, we raised ourselves. I started working when I was 14, same. I just had to figure it out.
So I’ve always been that way. I will take every opportunity that’s given to me. I’ll never say no. I’ll take every open door. That was so deeply ingrained in me that it was difficult to shift and fight. As a result of a couple of massive breakdowns, I had a really dark breakdown at the end of 2020, dark…
Gina: I’m sorry, Britt.
Britt: You know what? We go through the sh*t.
Gina: Sorry to hear that. I mean, I hope that you’re feeling better now cause that was not too long ago and nobody knows what you go through behind closed doors. I just hope that you’re doing good. You seem beautiful and amazing and great, but I’m sorry you went through that.
Britt: I appreciate that. And I feel pretty amazing and great, but to what you said, I had to really tighten up my boundaries as a result of that.
You know how when you have those dark periods, you go through the sh*t and first of all, you feel like garbage for a minute. But then you take a look around and you’re like, how the hell did I get here? How do I make sure that I don’t continue walking this path and that I get to a better, stronger place?
In going through times like that, I’ve realized I can’t be everything to everybody. And choosing–what is that saying about 20% of your efforts will produce 80% of the results?–I have just lived that so often that the closer you can get to that 20%, the happier you’ll be.
To what you were saying, I cut a lot of toxic people out of my life. Sorry about it, if you were one of the people. I’m wishing you the best, but can’t do it. Bye. Can’t do it. Hope everything works out for you, but I’m not going to be the doormat for you anymore.
The thing about it that’s hard is that it makes me feel crappy that you’re somebody–you reach out and DM. I want to be there for you, cause I love you. That’s the hard part is it’s having the boundaries of even sometimes saying no to the stuff where you’re like, God, I’d love to do that, but my 20% is here right now. That’s the hard sh*t. I’d love to be like, I’ve got it all dialed in and it feels great. It doesn’t always feel great.
I think in life, everything is reason, season, or lifetime. Right now I’m in this season where, unless I’m fully focused and unless I’m staying in the zone where I’m actually getting to where I want to be, I could so easily slip back into a really nasty place. That feels too risky to me. I’m not willing to risk it. So, to what you were saying, the boundaries feel like my lifeline. That’s how I’ll keep my marriage intact. That’s how I’ll stay a good mother. It goes down to the fundamental things.
I don’t know about you, but I had this conversation with myself where I was like, I could literally lose everything. I could lose the coaching business. I could lose the industry. Everybody could decide they hate me. I could lose my job. I could go broke. All of it. As long as I have my kids, my husband, my mental health, my sanity, I don’t really give a sh*t about that much else. You know what I mean? I want all the other things, it’s cool. But when you get down to the foundation of, what makes me actually happy? Those things start to become really clear.
Gina: Yeah. I can totally relate to that, and I’m working on that. That’s something that–one of the things I’m working on right now is how much do I need?
Britt: Oh, yes! Yes.
Gina: That’s a big one. Because once you decide and it’s like, when you… I’ve been growing a 100% year over year. 2020, let’s not talk about. But you know…
Britt: No, we don’t talk about that time.
Gina: We don’t talk about that in business. I looked at Shopify and it eeeee, wham. I was like, oh my God. I can’t even look.
But I’ve been growing year over year, over year, and that growth is very… one of my primary needs is growth.
Britt: Same!
Gina: I do the six human needs; you know what I’m talking about. I love growth and it’s something that turns me on. I just love it, and just figuring out what is enough.
Britt: Can you talk about that for a second? Oh my God, you’re getting all the feels from me. The, what is enough? I don’t know what enough is. That is so hard for me. I don’t know if I’ve ever actually achieved the result I’m looking for. There’s always a more.
Gina: I read this thing. I posted it in Mastermind the other day. It was just a YouTube video, cause all we do is watch YouTube now. We watch Joe Rogan, the news, and…
Britt: Who watches T.V.?
Gina: I know, we just watched YouTube. And one of the things that came up, it was some, I forget the name of it, but it said the secret to life, the reason for living, the meaning of life is to be alive. That’s it. All of us run around trying to find a bigger reason and search outside of ourselves, when it’s as simple as it’s just to be alive.
When you grow up with so many struggles, and that self-esteem, and you have no self-esteem–that was something I learned in rehab. I don’t have self-esteem. I grew up with little holes in my heart and then I filled them up with what other people said about me and I was bullied a lot. I had a lot of trauma.
So I didn’t have a proper, ‘I am beautiful. I am amazing. I am strong. I am powerful. I am worthy of being here. I’m worthy of taking up space here. My voice matters.’ I didn’t have that. So literally, I look for outer esteem: money, status, likes, all of this vanity (BEEP), Britt.
I’m at the point now where it’s just like, I love my community and I’m sure you feel the same with yours. I’ve got my people, I’ve got my tribe. I don’t care if it grows quickly. I don’t care if it grows slowly. I don’t care if people unsubscribe. What I care about is the people who want to be on this ride with me. It keeps me way less overwhelmed with trying to have to do everything all at once.
Britt: Same. I love that. I hope you know now that you’re beautiful and intelligent and amazing and inspiring and impactful and all the things, cause you are.
Gina: I love you. You’re just so amazing. I love that we can connect as who we are and there’s no competition. It’s really just all love. I’m just really happy for you and proud of you that you set boundaries. I look up to you, I always will. I think you’re great.
I disagreed with you on one thing, and I was very vocal about it to myself. I was like, what the f*ck is she doing? How dare she?
Britt: I love that you love me enough to give it to me straight. To what you said, that’s a real friendship. That’s real real. And I hope we can keep going down this journey together because I have so much respect for you. I look up to you. I learned so much from you in just our time together today.
Gina: I hear so much away from this.
Britt: Same! I feel like you took me to church today. I’m on a high now after our conversation. I had so many breakthrough moments and a little more respect for myself and…
Gina: I think you’re great, Britt. I think you’re really doing it. And I’m really proud to be in the same category as you. I feel like we are in the same category as business educators and coaches and I think we’re doing a really (BEEP) awesome job and I hope we collaborate more. I’m excited to be on Thrivers and your Thrivers Live. I’m so thrilled that you even asked me. I’m honored.
Britt: Well, you were the first person. I was like, how do I get Gina? Top of my list.
Gina: Yeah, no, you got me and I’m going to kill it. I cannot wait. So thank you for the opportunity to come on your show. I’m excited to put this on the Gina Bianca Podcast so everyone can listen, too. I’m just so grateful, Britt. Cheers to many more.
Britt: Cheers to many more, friend.
Ugh, Gina, thank you so much for your time. What an incredible interview. We will definitely do it again.
If you guys are not already, make sure that you follow @iamginabianca on Instagram. Gina has her own podcast. It’s so easy to find the Gina Bianca Podcast, wherever you like to listen and download. As I always like to say so much love, happy business building, and I’ll see you on the next one.
